The Garden: Twenty nice things

While many have been saying hello and happy new year, we on The Garden are saying happy twenty nice things taken from twenty nineteen.  This year, we expect at least twenty nice things to happen to us, twenty nineteen must be kind to us all and I hope that you are ready.  A lot of leaders especially pastors usually come out with themes for each new year and I have personally chosen a theme for myself too and named it Self Care, yes it is twenty nice things the year for self care.

While I was at Clicks store with my Mother, I remember I was coming to collect a prescription which I received from the hospital the previous night.  My friend Khotso Sello hit me up on WhatsApp and so we started chatting. As soon as he heard about how bad I have been he opted to tell me about self care and went on to narrate his experience at a recent talk he attended on self care – Khotso an I have a tendency of over sharing – I remember reading his text and listening to his voice notes and then suddenly it dawned on me that this is how The Garden came about!  The reason why I created the Garden in the first place was for Self Care, how could I of all people neglect myself? And that was my come back call.

The Garden is a wellness spot and through it I promote living a fulfilled life in that I share with you how you can achieve a holistic state of wellness because a healthy you is a happy you.  Holistic in the sense that often times we give attention to one area and neglect the rest which leads to only a specific area in our lives thriving.  Often times the areas which we have neglected can cause so much damage and defeat the purpose of wellness all together, rubbishing the efforts we have made on the thriving area.  Remember we are a spirit who lives in a body and has a soul meaning we are triparty.  Therefore if we are to achieve holistic wellness or rather live a fulfilling life, we need to feed all these three areas, our spirit, mind and body. Why is this necessary Lerato? Is it even feasible?

Did you know that you can learn how to take care of yourself?  Did you know that self care is not an indulgence, it is respect?  Most people talk about self care as if it is an indulgence, something that people do who have extra time to kill or extra cash to spill, a people of certain hobbies, interests or caliber but this is not true.  Anyone can and should care for themselves, self care is a way of saying to yourself I recognise you, I love you and I respect you.  Your body works hard to help you function daily so that you can achieve your deadlines, tasks, chase your dreams and go about your life.  You need your body in top form in order to perform effectively on a daily basis , it is after all your house -but the body gets tired, it gets sick and it weakens and so you have to keep refueling to avoid running on empty.  You can do this by eating right, sleeping enough, going for your medical check ups, bathing and dressing well etc. there are many ways you can take care of your body.

On the same breath you want to take care of your mind/soul because it is after all your central drive, you cannot function effectively without the healthy state of your mind and so as you go about your business you apply your mind more than you’d like to admit.  Most scholars like to say that as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he which means we are our thoughts or rather we become our thoughts , (now tell me that this is not an important function? ) All the more reason you should be taking care of your mind/soul and you can do this by feeding it regularly with knowledge with good thoughts and all the things you would like to see manifest in your life. One of the best things you can do for your mind is learn the art of mental cleansing – this an exercise or practice whereby you intentionally make out time to get rid of all the negative thoughts or traumatic experiences and make room for new and better things.

Lastly, you are a spirit so you need to handle your spirit with care and there are several ways you could do this.  Foremost you must be careful the energy you allow in your space, be sensitive and discerning, learn to spend some quiet time alone, learn to every now and again meditate, pray, read books, spend time with loved ones, go and spend time with nature e.g. go for a swim or bird watching amongst others..  But Lerato I don’t have the time,

You make time for the things that really matter!  In life you learn what we call priorities and if you say you love yourself, self care needs to be on top of your priorities’.  Too many people go about talking self -care but how many of us actually practice it especially behind closed doors?  It is easy for us to hold seminars and talks about self-care but we are the first to neglect ourselves as soon as we get to our homes and our work spaces.  2018 was that year for me, a year I lost my discipline along the way and stopped my work out routine and became careless with my eating habits which really compromised my body.  I had never had such health issues in my entire life even more damaging is that I entertained an environment and a relationships I knew very well was toxic for me and I still tolerated it, which ended up implicating my mental health.  Sometimes we need to make decisions that are good and healthy for us and it is all part of respect thus self care.  It is therefore imperative we take care of ourselves and our whole self for that matter.

On The Garden this year, you can expect a series of articles that will be on various subject matters all addressing either, your body, mind or spirit in no particular order.  I appreciate the emails I receive from some of you and I would like to encourage more of you to please feel free to engage with me by either commenting on the comment section provided on the column or simply send me an email as provided at the bottom of the article.  Tell me what book you are  reading, what sport you have taken up, let me know the various things you are doing to take care of yourself ,  always love to hear from you.  I trust that we can kick start our week to refresh, reflect and reform together in order to ultimately live a happy and fulfilling life. Happy twenty nice things once again, go and respect yourself and do it unapologetically so, happy self care!